Couples Therapy
Creating Space for Understanding & Repair
From conflict and disconnection toward clarity and renewed connection
When You Feel Painfully Alone Together
Over the years, I’ve met many couples who still care deeply for each other but find themselves caught in the same arguments, misunderstandings, or painful silences. Conversations that once felt easy now go wrong quickly, partners begin walking on eggshells or avoiding difficult topics, and it slowly begins to feel as though you are living side by side rather than truly together. Many couples notice they begin to feel more like roommates, co-parents, or partners managing daily life than two people who once felt emotionally close, and are left wondering how things drifted so far or whether closeness can be found again.
When you come to me, we begin by slowing things down and looking carefully at what has been happening between you, so you leave our first conversation with a clearer sense of what may be keeping you stuck and how things might begin to shift.
How We Will Work Together
In my experience, couples work becomes more helpful when we first create some stability rather than trying to solve everything in the middle of crisis. For this reason, I structure our work in stages.
Stage 1: Understanding Both of You & Finding Direction
We begin with a 90-minute Relationship Clarity & Guidance Session, where I meet each of you individually and then together to understand what has been happening in your relationship.
Before we meet, both partners complete background questionnaires along with the Gottman Relationship Checkup. These help me evaluate relationship patterns, individual histories, and factors contributing to current difficulties.
Drawing from these along with our conversation, I offer reflections and guidance so you leave the session with clearer understanding of what may be keeping you stuck and what next steps are likely to help. Many couples find this first conversation itself brings meaningful clarity and direction.
At times, I may feel that beginning couples therapy is not the most helpful next step. When this happens, I discuss it openly and may suggest individual therapy with me for one or both partners. I also take into account wider personal and life circumstances affecting emotional well-being, so the guidance I offer supports both the relationship and each of you as individuals.
Stage 2: Laying the Foundation for Couples Work
At this stage, I meet each partner individually in weekly sessions to build emotional regulation and deepen self-awareness, helping reduce reactivity and better understand patterns affecting the relationship.
As emotional overwhelm reduces and responsibility becomes clearer, conversations between partners usually begin to feel calmer and more constructive, allowing couples sessions to move the relationship forward rather than repeat the same painful cycles.
Stage 3: Ongoing Couples Therapy
With this foundation in place, joint sessions focus on improving communication, repairing trust, resolving resentments, and rebuilding connection while developing healthier ways of relating.
As conversations become safer and less reactive, partners gradually move away from defensiveness and self-protection toward listening and responding with greater care — learning, over time, to relate from a more open and heart-centred place rather than from patterns of hurt or blame.
Meaningful change takes time and practice, and regular sessions allow new patterns to take root in everyday life.
The Space I Hold for Couples
I aim to create a calm, respectful, and steady space where both partners feel safe enough to speak honestly, even when conversations feel difficult.
My work draws from research-based approaches such as Gottman Couples Therapy along with mindfulness-based and heart-centered perspectives, including Nonviolent Communication, Internal Family Systems, and contemplative traditions from Yoga and Buddhist psychology. Rather than following a rigid method, I adapt the work to what each couple needs.
At the heart of this process is helping both partners recognize the patterns they get caught in and take responsibility for their own responses. As awareness grows and reactivity reduces, couples often find new ways of listening, responding, and reconnecting with each other.
My role is not to take sides, but to help both partners see what keeps them stuck and develop healthier ways of relating.
“I can do nothing for you but work on myself. You can do nothing for me but work on yourself.” — Ram Dass
And often, with greater understanding and care, you and your partner begin to rediscover moments of connection and a sense of being together rather than apart.
For Couples Considering Separation or Divorce
If separation or divorce has entered the conversation, you may feel confused, pressured, or emotionally exhausted — especially when children or extended family are involved.
Discernment counseling helps couples slow down and gain clarity before making life-changing decisions.
Through a combination of joint and individual sessions, we explore whether genuine effort toward repair feels possible, or whether separation is the healthier path forward.
The goal is not to push couples toward staying together, but to help each partner arrive at a decision with clarity and confidence rather than confusion or regret.
Tara , we can't thank you enough! We are both back together after our separation as we could work things out between us on the basis of your analysis & guidance, we now know our limitations as a couple & are working to make our relationship better. We will have to say none of this would have been possible without your counseling. I hope couples in trouble find you & eventually find themselves. In fact, the questions in the Checkup Questionnaire made us think about ourselves & our lives ahead & had a lasting impact. Thank you again!
Deciding to do Couples Therapy with Tara was one of the best decisions of my life. Not only did I feel heard and understood for the first time in my life, she also made me realize my partner's emotional state. Couples Therapy requires both partners to work upon the suggestions given to them. Unfortunately, this was not the case with us. Though my husband and I are still living separately, Tara helped me find peace and patience to wait and work upon myself. I have a ten month old son and I am making the most of every day and travel alone with him — Tara played a very important role in helping me realize this hidden strength inside me.
